I Love You Not: I Love You Not

I Love You Not

Chapter 10

By Sara Cookie

"If man were immortal he could be perfectly sure of seeing the day when everything in which he had trusted should betray his trust, and, in short, of coming eventually to hopeless misery. He would break down, at last, as every good fortune, as every dynasty, as every civilization does. In place of this we have death." ~Charles Sanders Peirce

Hello everyone! Sorry for the super late chapter. My brother visited me last weekend, and I intended to spend every waking moment with him. He's a really good brother :) Anyways, this chapter is the end of Part 2 of I Love You Not. Part 3 will begin with Chapter 11. I hope you guys like this (: Enjoy.

- Sara

Jay

"So, you're pretty fond of Allie, huh?" Melonie said to me, putting perfectly sculpted food into the oven.

I looked up from my book and studied her face. Over the last few days, I've alternated between hanging out with Shannian and cuddling with Allison. Avoiding being kissed every other minute took a lot of energy out of me. You can only handle those girls for so long.

I smiled at Melonie. "She's an excellent person."

Melonie laughed. "I know... so why aren't you with her right now? I'm sure this is boring for you."

"There's only so much I can take, dear Melonie. Do you know how energetic they are? They always team up and jump me when I get home from work. You're much calmer." I said.

She giggled. "It sure sounds like them." She closed the oven.

The sun was beginning to set. My girls were bound to come home soon.

After a few minutes of silence, she checked on her meal, which wasn't ready yet. She shut the oven door and looked at me. "You're dressing differently today."

I smirked at her. "I plan on proposing to Allison today."

She stared at me, wide-eyed. Her surprise slowly turned into realization, then anger. She smacked my leg. "You jerk! Don't joke about that stuff!"

I laughed, not feeling her hand. "You're so violent!"

She rolled her eyes. "That's a lie. You need gentle hands to cook."

I snickered. "Do you not need strong hands too?"

She thought for a brief moment. As she opened her mouth to speak, the oven rang. She gave me a skeptical look and opened the oven. The smell of perfectly made dim sum floated into my nostrils.

I took I deep breath. "That smells delicious."

She blushed. "Thank you."

I smiled. She seemed to only blush when her cooking was praised. I watched as she closely inspected her food, looking for the slightest defect or decoration out of place. Smiling with relief, she took her perfect meal and laid it carefully on the counter, admiring it. It almost looked like she adored her creation. She was lost in her own little world of perfection.

"How much time you you spend on cooking?"

She jumped, startled. She seemed to have forgotten that I was sitting by her. "Umm, I cook for most of my day after class. I cook for everyone here, so I have to make a lot of food."

I nodded. "I see."

She put the finishing touches on her food perfectly. "You're not human, right?"

I wasn't surprised that she knew. She was one of the smartest children in the world, after all. I nodded.

She sighed and smiled. "I thought so." She giggled at the pleasure of solving the mystery.

"I really want to marry her some day, you know." I said.

She stopped laughing as if she ran into a brick wall. "How is that possible?"

I laughed and put down my book. "With proper documentation and a wedding ceremony, of course."

She stared at her food. "You know what I mean, Jay. There are lots of flaws with your plan. Can you die?"

"Not with old age." I answered.

"There's problem number one. One day she'll get old and die and you'll be alone."

I shrugged. "I'll just live the best life I can with her every day until she expires. I can make her happy. Plus, after Allison's gone," I flinched. "I'll still have Shannian. I won't be alone."

"What if she dies too?"

"That's not possible."

"You never know."

I stood up and walked to the window, looking over the city with an eagle eye. "Then I'll have nothing to live for. I would mind as well die too."

She sighed. "Exactly. Isn't it sad to see your loved ones dying all around you?"

"I've never loved anyone who was capable of dying of old age until now. So instead on focusing on the death of the people I love, I would rather focus on the memories we could make until that time comes."

She nodded. "You speak like an old man, Jay."

I laughed. "I have enough experiences to be an old man. Besides that, I need to ask you an extremely important question." I watched as the sun slowly lowered itself into the sea.

"Shoot."

"As Allison's best friend, may I have your permission to take her as my wife?" I looked back at her.

She smiled. "Jay, I have no idea why you love her so much over the course of just a week. I'm guessing you've either known her longer, or you've been stalking her your whole life."

I snickered. "Something like that."

"I give you permission, but you have to promise to take care of her until the day she dies."

"You're so corny." I teased.

She ate some of her dim sum. "Whatever" She said with her mouth full.

I looked back out at the city. "I promise."

The sun set on my day just as the front door slammed and my two favorite voices called my name.

---

Allison... A few days later.

I was dipping in and out of sleep. Conscious, but not conscious, I listened to the sounds of my home.

In the kitchen, I heard pots and pans clanking as Melonie made breakfast.

Across the hall, I heard Mikey working out to hardcore techno music.

On the floor directly below me, I heard Trent playing his bass.

In the classroom, I heard Aaron taking a break from hacking and playing a video game on his lap top.

Outside, I heard the sound of Jay and Shannian laughing, followed shortly by the sound of a motorcycle zooming away.

I sat up when I could no longer hear Jay's engine. Looking around, I found myself alone in the spare bedroom. No fair! Jay must have taken his sister out to the city without me.

Sometimes, I was amazed by how much he loved her. I often questioned which of us he loved more. Of course, that was a ridiculous thing to compare. He obviously loved her more. She is his sister, after all.

I sat down at the piano, putting my thoughts aside. My fingers sped across the keys.

My day was mostly spent alternating between eating the fabulous meals that Melonie made and practicing piano. I played until about two in the afternoon. It was odd that Jay wasn't back yet. Noticing that I was still in my pajamas this late in the day, I got up and walked to my room to get ready for my mother to come visit me.

She had called me two days ago, informing me that she was going to pay me a visit. I thought about what I was going to wear, and I soon settled with my Le Ceur Boarding School uniform.

As I passed by the boys' room, I stopped to the sound of Trent playing his bass. Lured in by the sweet deep notes, I relaxed on Trent's bed and smiled.

"Good morning, Miss Trentel." Trent smiled as he continued to play.

"Good evening, Mr. Forester." I answered.

"We haven't talked in quite a while. What brings you to this neck of the woods?"

"Only your amazing bass skills." I giggled. Trent was actually a really cute guy who I never considered dating. I've always believed that he and Melonie had a behind the scenes relationship. Or maybe they were just friends with benefits.

"I'm not that great." He spoke with a deep voice that matched his bass almost perfectly.

I stared at him. "You've got to be kidding me. You're so humble. Everyone knows you're the best bass player in the universe."

He stopped playing momentarily and laughed full-heartily. "You're quite spunky, aren't you?"

"You're quite cute, aren't you?" As soon as those words were out, I slapped my hands over my mouth.

His pretty purple eyes left my face. "You shouldn't be saying that while you have a boyfriend... or two."

I rolled my eyes. "I only have one boyfriend, for your information. I think Mikey has finally given up on me. And besides the fact, you have no reason to call me spunky while you have a girlfriend too!"

He looked back at me with a smile that could make your heart melt right out of your chest into your hands. Yep, Melonie was definitely dating him.

"So, what if I'm dating?"

I was caught off guard by his smile. Why didn't I realize how cute he was before?

"Nothing! I just think that it's cute that you're dating my best friend." I attempted to smile normally.

"I think it's nice how you're dating Jay too. He's a good guy, but he's not normal." Trent said, pity clouding his eyes.

"What do you mean?" I asked blankly.

Trent began to play a different piece. "Have you not noticed? He seems older than he is. He's got an unnatural charm. He's different from us."

I stared at him for a long time.

He stopped playing. "I worry about you sometimes, Allie. How ever did you get in this school if you don't have the slightest observation skills?"

"What's that supposed to mean?!" I asked, confused.

"My point exactly." He smiled.

I dropped the subject. "I'm gonna go get ready for my guest. Thanks for talking to me." I hugged him briefly.

He hugged back. "See you later, Allie." Shortly after I left, I heard him begin to play again.

I brushed out my hair and put on my uniform and makeup. Grabbing a book, I sat in the entrance of the school and read.

I read a book called Thorn Birds. I had just gotten to the part where Meggie finds out that her baby brother has died. How sad would it be to see your sibling die like that? I had never lost someone to death in my life. I wiped away the threat of tears from my eyes as I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in!" I yelled.

Looking up from my book, I found my mother already standing by the coffee table. "Hello sweetheart!" She smiled her gorgeous smile and spoke with her gorgeous bell-like voice. She was beautiful, as always.

I lept up from my seat. "Mother!" I squealed.

I threw all my energy into hugging her. She made an "oomph" sound as I made impact.

I apologized as I pulled away. "Sorry Mother, I just missed you so much."

She laughed. "No problem sweetie. You should have seen yourself! You shot yourself at me like a rocket."

I smiled. "Where have you been Mama?"

"What do you mean 'where have you been'? Where have you been?" She asked.

"Well, I've been busy with schoolwork and stuff." I answered.

"Oh, I see. So busy that you haven't even thought of making a single call to your dear mother."

I giggled. "Like you're the one to talk! You haven't called or visited since I left."

"Well, your father didn't want me to take the trip alone. He thought I would get carried away." She rolled her eyes.

"Oh, he's just overprotective. Come sit, Mama. Let's talk."

We sat on the couch and talked for hours. We talked about Daddy, the house, my schoolwork, politics, current events, and last, my relationships.

"Oh yes, Mama. He's a really good guy. He's nice and athletic, humble and chivalrous. He's the perfect boyfriend!"

She smiled wide. "That's great sweetie! I'm so proud of you." She stood up. "It's almost five. I should probably get going."

I stood up too. "But Mom! He might be home soon. He took his sister out somewhere a long time ago. He should be back any second."

Disgust quickly flashed across her face. If I had blinked, I would have missed it.

She pulled me into a hug. "Sorry cupcake. Your father wanted me home before it got dark. If I don't leave soon, I'll be late."

"Oh..." I hugged her back. "Okay Mama, I love you."

She pulled away and gave me a dazzling smile. "I love you too baby."

I couldn't have asked for a better mother. "I'm going to miss you."

She looked out the window. "Is he really that good of a guy?"

"Oh, amazing!" I said without hesitation. "He's really cute too."

She nodded. "Good."

As she turned around to leave, I heard a struggle outside.

"No! Let me see her!" I female voice yelled. It sounded like Shannian.

"Stop wiggling around so much!" Jay growled. "Shannian! Shannian, STOP!"

Shannian burst through the front door of the school, locking it behind her.

I heard the knob wiggle. Jay cursed as he found the door locked. I could hear him begin to pick it expertly.

I've never seen so much hope in one expression before. Joy and love filled Shannian's eyes as she gazed at my mother.

My mother responded with the exact opposite emotions. If looks could kill, Shannian would have been a bloody pile on the floor.

Jay burst in seconds later. He looked at every one of us individually, analyzing the situation. His eyes rested on mine, wearing a pleading look.

"Mommy." Shannian whispered. "Mommy I've missed you!" Tears of joy poured down her cheeks as she began to hug my mother.

Mother rejected her entirely. "How dare you?!" She screamed in her face. "How dare you call me your mother?!"

Shannian gaped at her. "But... but..."

"I told you to never speak to me in that way! You disgusting little creature!" Mother screamed.

My eyes were wide. I had never heard my mother speak in this way. "Mom, you know her?"

She ignored me.

She looked at Jay instead. "And you. You took Allie away from me, you little devil. I see you've broken your side of the deal. You've found her, so now I get to do anything I want with her, correct?" Mother smiled an evil smile and looked back at Shannian.

"Don't you dare." Jay said quietly.

She laughed flatly. "You ugly piece of crap! I've always hated you! Everyone hates you! You should just die!"

I gasped. It was as if something died inside of Shannian after every insult she received.

Her lip quivered. "But... Mom... I l-love you!"

"I told you not to call me that!" She raised her hand high in the air.

I covered my eyes and heard a loud pop as my mother slapped Shannian in the face.

I opened my eyes to find myself wronged.

Shannian was frozen in terror. Jay had pushed past her and taken the beating himself.

Shannian erupted in sobs.

Jay's face was neutral as if it had happened to him a million times. "You just crossed the line, you evil bitch!"

Mother's facial expressions turned into full-fledged hate. "Just wait until your father gets a hold of you two! I'd kill you right now if there were no witnesses!"

Jay's expression turned deadly. "Likewise, Mom."

My mother was taken back by his look.

I walked around the couch slowly to stand by my mother. I stared wide-eyed at Jay, whose look was murderous.

If looks could kill, Mother wouldn't just be a bloody pile on the floor, she would be in a billion little pieces stuck to the walls of the room.

I was extremely confused. Last time I checked, I was an only child. There were so many questions to be asked.

Mother recovered quickly. She looked directly at Shannian, intent on inflicting deeper damage on her soul.

The next few seconds were a blur of insults from my mother, Jay yelling to overpower her, and Shannian pounding on his back, begging him to stop.

Finally back to my senses, I threw myself in between my mother and my boyfriend. "Everyone! Please! Calm down!"

The room went silent. Shannian covered her face and ran out of the room sobbing. Jay followed her like a fox chasing a rabbit.

I stared at my mother. "What the hell just happened?"

---

Jay... One week later.

I spent the next week comforting my sobbing sister. She cried for the first three days after my mother re-appeared into her life. After that, she was just an empty shell. I had to constantly remind her to eat, sleep, and speak.

Today, my sister was sleeping for the 5th time, adding up to a total of 20 hours of sleep. Two hours were spent staring at the ceiling, and one hour was spent staring at me. Laying in bed for 23 hours was starting to cramp my back up. I buried my head in Shannian's hair, taking in her smell.

My poor, innocent sister. How much longer do I have to protect you?

I felt her shift. I opened my eyes and sat up, watching as her eyes fluttered open.

She pushed her body off the bed into a sitting position.

I smiled at my her. "Good evening, sleepy head."

She said nothing, staring at the end of the bed.

"What, are my feet more interesting than me?" I joked.

She looked at me.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in." I said.

Allison was all-smiles as the entered the room. "Hey guys." She stood by Shannian's side of the bed. "Hey, Shannian. How are you doing?"

Shannian stared at her. I nudged her with my elbow. She jumped. "Oh, um, I'm okay." Shannian said quietly.

"She just woke up." I explained.

"Ah." Allison said.

There was an awkward silence.

"I'm going to get a drink." Shainnian stated. There was no life in her voice.

"Want me to come with you?" I asked, eager for a reason to get out of bed.

She shook her head and slid off the bed, heading towards the door.

I sighed. "Love you Sis."

"Love you too." She mumbled as the door shut behind her.

I scooted over. Allison climbed into bed with me.

I stared off. "I'm so worried for her."

Allison nodded. "Me too. Mother explained everything to me."

"Oh yeah?" I asked. "What did she say?"

"She said that you two were left on her doorstep as children and turned out to be horrible kids."

I was silent.

"That's not true, is it Jay?"

Suddenly, I found myself on top of her, pinning her down. "Allison. Please, remember."

She stared at me. "Hey, whoa, Jay? Are you in the mood or something?"

My eyes pleaded with her. "Allison! Focus." I held her face in my hands.

She looked at my face up and down. "Okay, I'm focused." Her arms slid down to her side.

"Remember Allison? Remember me? Jay Trentel. The man in the attic. The guy you were always curious about. The only guy who pushed you away when your hormones were raging. The guy who taught you piano. The guy who finally kissed you on your 18th birthday, putting you into a spiral of amnesia and confusion. Do you remember?"

We stared eye to eye for what seemed like eternity.

"...Jay, what are you talking ab- oh!" Her eyes widened.

I smiled. "Welcome back, baby."

Allison

Every memory I had lost poured back into my mind. Every sunny day, every cold night, every moment of happiness, despair, love, and hurt flashed back into my mind. I remembered everything I had forgotten, like a door being unlocked to a file room. My mind was a super receptionist and went through every file in the matter of seconds. I smiled. "Jay."

"Yes?" he asked, pulling me into a hug.

"You're an idiot." I laughed, tears falling down my cheeks.

"I know."

He pulled away. "Lets grab Shannian and get out of here, okay?"

I nodded. "You have so much explaining to do, mister."

He snickered and got up, getting dressed in his usual designer brand outfit. I gathered my things around the room.

Suddenly, a cry rang out through the house.

"MOMMA! NOOO!"

Jay's head shot up. He sprinted out of the room.

"Jay!" I ran after him, realizing that the scream belonged to Shannian.

He stopped on a dime in the doorway of the kitchen/dining room. I ran into his back. Rubbing my nose, I tried pushing around him to see what was happening.

Shannian was laying on the tile floor, black blood pouring out of her head. She turned paler and paler as the seconds ticked by.

I screamed. "Oh my god! No! Maybe she's just knocked out!" I pushed past Jay and bent down by her to feel her pulse. I checked her neck and both wrists, hoping I was checking the wrong places as each pulse point failed to reply. I looked up at Jay.

Something in him had broken. He already knew the outcome. Nothing in him gave any sign to life. His eyes were wide and filled with the need to fall over and die too.

I stood up and hugged him hard. He was ice cold.

Meanwhile, my mother was giggling into her palm. She stood over Shannian with triumph in her eyes. "You should have seen this brat! 'Oh Momma, I love you! Oh Momma, I'd give anything for you to love me too!' Just one look and a zap to the head and she was gone!" She laughed harder.

I gaped at her. Mother had killed Shannian with some kind of mental immortal power.

I looked at Jay. The composed man I was holding was no longer well put together. He was a crying wreck. He felt as if he could go limp at any moment and topple over, dying with his sister. It was terrifying.

"Jay?" I said softly. "Please, say something."

"Oh," said my mother, "you wanna know the last thing she said to me before I zapped her?"

"Mom, stop it!" I yelled, hugging Jay harder, trying to cover his ears.

She continued. "She said, 'Mommy, I would give my life for you!'" Mother erupted into a larger fit of laughter.

Jay pushed me away and ran out of the room, stumbling down the hall. With every step, he became more off balanced. A picture frame would fall and shatter on the ground with every wall he fell onto.

I ran after him. "Jay!"

As soon as he got outside, he vomited into the grass and spit out blood. I grabbed him from behind. "Jay come back inside! Stop hurting yourself!"

He stumbled out of my grasp and ran to the cliff behind the school.

He looked as if he contemplated jumping. Instead, he screamed. He yelled at the city, at the world. Yelled at God, and fate, and karma. He yelled at everyone for taking his dear sister away from him.

I watched him, tears pouring down my cheeks...

To be continued...